My Secret Love Affair (iPhone)

If I write about this then it will no longer be a secret.  It is something that I just have to do, otherwise I will feel like I am just not being real with you.  After all, it is very important to get our feelings out in the open.  Love can be so obsessive.  This has been going on since December of 2010. I just did not have the courage to write about it.  Many times I sat down here at my computer but the words would just not come.  Then there was the day that I read another blog.  That was the day that I knew what I had to do.  I had to WRITE ABOUT IT!  Yes, it is true!  Yours truly has been having a love affair with an I Phone.

Oh my, it is out now.  I feel so much better.  I no longer am living a boomer lie.  I can be free like Robert when he told you about his smartphone.  I LOVE MY  I PHONE!  I WANT TO SHOUT IT FROM THE ROOF TOP.  It is my best friend.  It goes everywhere with me.  I admit, like any other affair there is still more to learn but it has given me so much pleasure. I handle it delicately like a china doll.  At first I didn’t know how to treat it.  It looked so innocent and bare so I carried it in a baggy for fear that it might get wet and not work.  Then it showed me how powerful it was when I tuned into I tunes.   The charge was wonderful and electrifying.

My iPhone and I were all alone in my work vehicle.  It was winter.  The night was cold and lonely as it had been so many nights before.  I turned the switch on.  Face book was the first thing that I saw.  I knew at that very moment that I was in love.  Never again would I be alone at night as I patrolled the dark areas.  Never again would I be without the comfort of knowing that I could reach out and caress it at any time.  I loved everything about it.  The black case hugged it so tight just as I myself did at times.  The sounds that it made when I set it on snooze while we relaxed under the stars gave me a rush.

I was so afraid that this was only a dream.  I checked often to feel the I phone snuggled up near me to make sure that it had not left.  I wanted more.  I asked myself why I had not done this sooner.  Why had I waited to feel this blitz and suffered so many nights alone?  It did not matter, it was mind now.

At the end of the night at work, I would carry it safely to our apartment.  Carefully, I plugged it into its charger so that it would re juice and revive itself.  It lay there looking content and satisfied just as I was.  It was everything to me.

Here it is over six months later and my iPhone has still not disappointed me.  It has gone for a ride it an ambulance as I was carried to intensive care.  It has laid by my bedside and listened to me moan and groan.  Now it is no longer a secret but I do have the itch so I am going to just tell you up front.  It is about time to move on to bigger and better.  I don’t want to carry old sand to a new beach.  Forgive me folks but I may just have to trade my well used I phone in for an iPad 2 and experience the ultimate in ecstasy.  This time it will be no secret.  I will let you know when  this affair begins.  I already have a name for my new ring tone, “Smile, Be Happy.”  Let the excitement begin!

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Robert Fowler

Robert Fowler is President of Retirement Media Inc.
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