Building Healthy Relationships In Today’s World

We boomers have known many relationships in our time.  There are relationships with family, co workers, neighbors, partners, business associates, health care professionals and even those that we meet on Face book and other social media sites.  Then we have a spiritual relationship and even a relationship with our very own being.  Relationships are different.  People are different.  Relationships can be complicated, rewarding, stressful, pleasant, positive or negative.  Bottom line; healthy relationships are necessary in order to feel good, know peace and be successful in our everyday living regardless of circumstances outside of ourselves.

This is a difficult subject for me to write about because I spent many years in unhealthy relationships so I am no expert on the topic, but I do have wisdom.  With that wisdom, I am in a continuing process of living, laughing, loving and learning.  Today I choose to have healthy relationships.  The four L’s are very important as I try to balance my physical, mental, spiritual and emotional self.  It takes work but the work is necessary to our overall health and well being.  With that said, I would like to share a wonderful experience that I have had with Robert Fowler the owner of Retirement Media.  I have never met Robert nor his beautiful wife MA but I think of them as close friends that have given me more than they will ever know.  It is time to say thank you and share some of my own personal secrets with him and you, my friends.  This is how I learned to develop an online working, positive, rewarding relationship with a person that is totally different from me,a person that I have never met.  This is the story and how it brought joy into my life. Robert, alka Mr. Fowler, this is HOW YOU AND MA INSPIRED MY LIFE by giving me the opportunity to practice building a healthy working relationship on line in today’s world! My reward has been great online friends that helped me with my PURPOSE, by living, laughing, loving and learning as we shared our thoughts, feelings and stories.

It began in November of 2010 as I commented on a post on Retirement Media Face Book where I was looking around dreaming of a retirement home on 55communityguide.com.   Up popped this Dude, yes I say Dude, named Robert. Dude is what I have called him a number of times whether HE  liked it or not.  lol  I disagreed with something he said about social security on his site.  Well, I was right, so being my usual, let’s get this right self, I commented.  So this Dude Robert, thanked me.  Yes, he thanked me instead of getting angry.  🙂  Then he even asked me to help him on the site since I had been a consistent commenter.  “Sure”, I thought to myself.  My mind took off with it’s distrusting self, for you see, I had had some bad experiences before in my earlier years of life on line.  The committees in the mind said, “What’s HE wanting?  Who is this ____?  Now does HE, Robert, really think that I am DUMB enough to believe that he owns this place?  Why would HE, Robert, need my help since HE is smart and I am not THAT educated?  Hec, I can’t write.  I am not even computer smart.  It must be a stalker. The Dude, doesn’t even have a pic of his face on this Retirement Media Face book.”  Wow what a trip those committees of the mind took me on since I had not even one little bit of trust left after my negative experience of relationship building on line from years long ago.  Now keep in mind friends that I am writing this for the first time and Robert has no idea that I had all those thoughts. The truth will set you free, I always say… 🙂

To make a long story short, I meditated for a couple of days then agreed.  “Why not? Robert appeared sincere and willing to teach me,” I thought to myself.  “Teach me?  You got to be kidding,” the mind jumped out in full blown negative mode again. 🙁  So our relationship began.  I learned Face booking, tweet twittering, blogging, and google golining.  He, Robert, continued to show respect, kindness, concern, patience, caring while I did everything possible to ruffle his feathers. 🙂  I wrote on his face book site about making chicken and dumplings, my sonic toothbrush and even napping.  Now when I wrote about the importance of a good nap for health I forgot to include the link.  Did Robert get mad or belittle me?  NO, he did not!  He just came back with that calm manner and wrote, “Ann, I need the link because I want to learn more about napping.”  Then there was the time when he had a problem seeing at night while driving so I filled him in on glare proof glasses.  Yes, I did.  Did he get mad?  No!  Then the blogging started.  I could write, but I didn’t know anything about blogging so I just let him know up front, “Robert, I am NOT linking, making pictures and YOU  have to edit.  Did he get mad?  NO!  Instead he welcomed the chance for us to work with each other as we both learned.  Then  I challenged him to a blog, which was, in my opinion, the best one ever!  He shared his experience about a humorous fishing trip with MA.  I found myself ROFL.  It was great!  I could always visualize MA sitting quietly in the background, with her sweet smile, shaking her head but being supportive of Robert’s new adventure with working with Working Boomer.

Now on a more serious note, MA and Robert touched my heart.  They were there with me in spirit as I rode in the ambulance for my emergency heart surgery.  Robert gave me my first and only birthday party on Retirement Media Face book.  He sent me books through the mail for my reading and learning pleasure, not knowing that it was my first time to receive gifts in the mail.  He and MA were there at Christmas time on line and they made my Christmas with a gift from their hearts which brought tears to my eyes as I cried with gratitude.  I spent that Christmas alone but I had my dear friends MA and Robert Fowler in my heart.  He gave me the opportunity to learn, laugh, live and experience the feeling of love for friends that I had not even met.  Robert gave me the opportunity to write and express myself by finding my voice.  Most important of all Robert and MA helped me build confidence and a healthy relationship with friends like you.  Robert gave me the opportunity to express my gratitude for senior centers and resource for senior apartments, low income housing, and beautiful pictures to view on his sites.   I put no human being on a pedestal but I can express my gratitude for the laughter, love, and learning that this work relationship brought to me.

So friends, as you continue your journey in life always remember to live, love, laugh and learn while you can.  Working Boomer will be retiring the name Working Boomer but she will always remember her experience and be grateful for the friends that she has met on line through Retirement Media.  She might stop into Boomer Places now and then to share a story and say, HOWDY FRIENDS..

Thank you Robert Fowler as you continue to spread the love and experiences that you have to share during the rest of your Baby Boomer years.  Much love, joy, success and peace to all of you as you continue building healthy relationships in your journey of life.  Always remember to face life with your head held high, be proud of who you are and never pass up a chance to live, love, laugh and learnPeace be with you all, my dear on line friends.

Originally posted 2012-06-20 20:35:55.

A Story OF Love From The Heart Of A Boomer

Sixty-two years ago I was born as a change of life baby on December 23,1948 to my parents who did not expect me to happen.  My mother was in her 40’s and my father in his 50’s.  Most of my childhood life was spent with older people.  Today I find myself as one of those people sitting here on Christmas eve. thinking about you and thinking about me.  Yes, I said you, the Boomer Generation of people.

There is snow on the ground.  Outside my door it is very quiet as though for just a few moments the world is still and at peace.  Some are with families.  Some are sitting with that special husband or wife.  Some are playing with their grandchildren.  Some are traveling to other places to visit friends. Some are sitting alone. Others are preparing meals to share with their love ones tomorrow.  Some may be watching television, reading a book, playing a game on the computer, waiting for a telephone call, wrapping a present, or ending a day of work.  There are some like police officers, fireman, health care workers, security people, truck drivers and etc. that may be working tonight and might be working tomorrow.

There are boomers that might be in nursing homes, hospitals, and even some in far away lands helping to keep our country safe.  Others might be volunteering their time in homeless shelters and even some boomers might be homeless.  Some boomers may have had children others may not.    Some may be blessed with riches and fame.  Then there are some who have very little and their pockets might me empty.  Some may have high educations and others little or no education.  Some may be sitting around a warm fireplace while others may be wishing for a warm fire.

In all of this there is somethings that we share in common.  We have a story.  We have a heart that can be prepared to forgive.  We have gained much wisdom.  We have experienced a lot.  We have made some kind of a mark on the world as it is today.  We can believe.  Some may be able to sing while others may only be able to smile.  Some like me might have a desire to write and share what I am feeling in my heart.

Tonight I think of you.  Tonight I think of me.  Tonight I want to reach out and give each one of you a hug.  Tonight if I was powerful enough, I would give you peace, love, joy, comfort, health, wealth, and a world filled with peace but I am not that powerful.  I do have the ability to write.  I do have the ability to feel.  I do have the ability to show compassion.  I do have the ability to care for others.  I do have the ability through this writing to let you know how special I believe that each and everyone one of you are.  No matter where you are, no matter what you are doing, no matter how you are feeling let it be known that tonight someone has thought of YOU.    We are one.  We are the people of the world.

Originally posted 2010-12-25 15:04:48.

Your Feelings Do Count

It appears that lately, I have been writing a lot about feelings, which is true. I have. Our feelings are a natural process of our thoughts and intentions. They can be negative or positive. Feelings should not be ignored but must not overtake us to the point that we feel paralyzed by them.

It appears that lately, I have been writing a lot about feelings, which is true.  I have.

Our feelings are a natural process of our thoughts and intentions.  They can be negative or positive.  Feelings should not be ignored but must not overtake us to the point that we feel paralyzed by them.  I am not a physician, psychologist, clergy or a person with a degree in feelings.  The one thing that I am is human and you are too if you are reading this blog.  Feelings are something that we all have and deal with in life.  Many articles have been written about feelings therefore always remember that they are important.  As human beings we must pay attention to our feelings.  Denying them will do no good.  Feelings have a way of manifesting themselves in many ways.  By paying attention to them we can find ways to lessen pain and make changes from negative to positive or accept what is in our life.  For me writing is the best way that I can begin to get my feelings out in the open and put them into perspective.  Until I have done this, I do not feel peace.  It is a wonderful thing to know that peace can be regained when we are willing to work toward it.  Hopefully by sharing some thoughts with you, you will be inspired to love yourself and know that your feelings are important in order to know peace.

First, I will say that you are not alone.  Also being truthful with ourselves is not always easy. It takes practice.  Sometimes it may be necessary to feel pain in order to do the work needed to regain peace.  Remember, it is our thinking that gets us into trouble.  We need to get our thoughts back on the right track.  You are not less than or more than, you are you.  No one likes to admit that they are not perfect but for me that is the first step.  When I become uncomfortable enough it becomes easier. So here it goes.  I am doing it now with your help as you read and I write.

  1. If you are physically sick, tired, lonely, or any other negative emotion then admit it.  I have been the greatest offender of saying, “Oh, it is a beautiful day, I should not feel this way.” I am here to tell you the weather is not the problem.  Maybe you are over worked, grieving a loss or missing a love one.  Get honest! Then and only then can you get control of your thoughts and take the steps necessary to feel better.
  2. When I was a child my parents taught me to always say NO when offered a treat, gift or something.  I can remember putting on a false smile, pushing back the tears and wanting so bad to say yes.  I know today that I was taught false pride.  Not only that, I was cheating another person out of the good feel of giving. Practice changing old tapes in your head and replace them with healthy ones.  It is okay to trust.
  3. There was a time when I worked two jobs and gave one hundred and fifty per cent at both of them.  As some of you do, I then had to have the cleanest house, the manicured lawn and everything in its correct place.  I denied that I needed rest and put everyone else before me.  Relax, it is okay to not be super human.
  4. As a child I was lead to believe that I was suppose to love everyone but it was not important if I was not loved.  It is important!  BELIEVE that you are loving and deserve love.

Your feelings are important.  They are sending you a message.  Listen closely to them.  Write them down.  Talk to someone about them.  Own them.  Get help if you need it.  Do not deny them.  Take charge!  Be the special person that you really are and know PEACE! If or when they get out of order keep practicing and each time it will become easier because not only will you love yourself, you will love PEACE.

By the way, thank you!  Writing did really help and I hope to read what you have to write.  🙂

Originally posted 2011-06-28 21:23:26.

Boomers Are Strong And Persevere

This is a list of some of the positives that we boomers took part in during our life time.

There has been a lot of writing about different opinions about baby boomers.  Some say that we brought about drugs and a different value system to this world.  As each generation comes along they are recognized for different things that happened during their era.  Boomers are no different.

I choose to dwell on the good regardless of what era it is.  No one generation is all bad or all good.  We all contribute to change and deal with what is put before us.  Each person is unique in their own way.  Instead of wallowing in the blame game, why not pull together and create a more loving, caring, environment for all people.  Stick with the basics.  Use gratitude instead of woe is me.  Use forgiveness instead of resentments.  Do the right thing.  Cultivate an attitude that you will be proud of and those around you will be drawn to follow.  Be a winner by setting an example that even the smallest child can see the good in you.  Show respect.  Do not be afraid to look another in the eye with pride in what you do.  You are important and each thing, big or small, can impact a life.  That life may just be the one that will finish what you started.  This is a list of some of the positives that we boomers took part in during our life time.

  1. We brought on some great rock music which will never be forgotten.
  2. We were there to start the tearing down of prejudice walls.
  3. We watched as the first man walked on the moon.
  4. We took small country roads and made them into highways.
  5. We connected communities so that better health care could be offered to rural areas.
  6. We pounded at the doors of our educational system until it improved.
  7. We protected our country with the dedication of women and men that were strong and persevered.
  8. We came to the relief of our neighbors during disasters such as floods, tornado, and earth quakes.
  9. We restored national monuments so that our history would never be forgotten.
  10. We built bigger, better, and safer parks so that families and children could enjoy what our country had to offer.
  11. We improved transportation so that we all would have the opportunity to enjoy the best.
  12. We introduced the computer, found cures for some diseases, instilled hope for the younger generation.
  13. We changed the way mental institutions were run and put forth guidelines in hospitals for the best of patient care.
  14. We improved sporting events and challenged our youth.
  15. We marched in the biggest of parades and held children on our backs to cheer the folks on.

These are but just a few things that boomers have been involved in as we stood strong.  We were not known as quitters.  Our lives have touched many.   It is up to each one of us what type of impact we want to make on each other.  Boomers are no more important or less important than any other generation of people.  We love our children, grandchildren, the elderly and all that are persevering as we go through the trying times of today.  Love is a powerful emotion so let the love light shine.   We need each other.  So when you walk down the street, help that elderly person, smile at that little child, encourage that hurting soul and remember that life and love will only go hand in hand if we do our part.

Originally posted 2011-06-08 15:27:24.

A Tribute To Two Special Groups of People

Working Boomer says This is a story that I feel needs to be written to give tribute to two groups of people that are dear to my heart. Those groups are Health care workers and Cancer patients.

Sometimes when writing even a difficult subject has to be tackled if the story needs to be told.  That is what I am going to try to accomplish in this story today.  This is a story that I feel needs to be written to give tribute to two groups of people that are dear to my heart.  Those groups are Health care workers and Cancer patients.

This time of year the shopping malls are crowded but so are the medical offices that treat patients with cancer.  So I would like to share about these groups so it might just give each and everyone of us a view from the inside as I once saw it.  Even though here I am going to try to focus on two certain groups, I would like to begin by thanking all healthcare workers for their dedication and what they give.

It was the week of Christmas during the holiday season.  The patient appointments were set up.  The physicians schedule was three times heavier than other times of the year.  The office was decorated cheerfully.  The workers were ready.  The patients came to get their treatment before the holiday so they could make this holiday count.  The workers had their own personal lives but as they entered the office that life was put on hold.  The phones rang off the hook.  The waiting room was full.  The day began.

The stress was high.  The feelings and emotions were at the highest peek.  The caring, compassion, hope, and love was in the the air.  The workers rushed around doing what health care employees do.  The patients sat in chemo rooms sharing stories with each other as the workers attended to them.  Christmas music played over  head.  Families waited to take their love ones home after their treatments.  The workers and the patients were tired but no one but no one was giving up.  There was a job to be done, a life to be touched, a heart to be consoled.

At the end of the day one might ask these questions. Who gave the most?  Who received the most?  Who laughed?  Who cried?  Who persevered?  Who fought the battle?    The answer to all the questions is just this.  Both groups did.

The workers challenged every obstacle and met the test.  They gave their all.  They gave their best. What group gave the most.  I really can not say.  Patients came in bearing gifts of homemade cookies, cakes, pies,oranges, apples in  crates and loads of gifts for the health care workers.  Some patients wore Santa Claus hats.  One even dressed as Santa and carried a bag full of gifts.  The desks of the workers were loaded down with gifts from these special patients.  The thank yous and well wishes were many.  Hugs and smiles were spread about from both groups.  The spirit of love and hope had over taken that office. It flowed freely from heart to heart.

So as we rush around during this holiday season, let us not forget these two special groups.  Let us learn from their example.  Let us fight the battle.  Let us share the love that we have in our hearts.  Let us care and make Each Day Count.  Let us carry in our hearts the meaning of what life is all about.

As a Working Boomer, I have experienced many things but these people will always have a big piece of my heart.  This was a place where I learned the true meaning of life and what it is really about.

Boomer Health

Originally posted 2010-12-21 21:44:11.

Boomer Memory Of Strengthened Faith

Boomer memories: A get-away turns dangerous when a Winter storm hits, trapping the girls in their cabin at the top of the mountain. Memories are to be shared and Working Boomer lets up know the rest of the story that she always will remember.

It was late March, a beautiful early spring day, as my friend Lou and I set out for the Ozark Mountains for a much needed get a way. I had received one of those free offers to a resort for two nights and three days as guests to view a vacation community. Since funds were low this was an opportunity that we just could not pass up. The sun was shining bright, the sky was crystal clear as we pulled into the resort entrance where we were met by a Realtor who graciously showed us to our condo. It was much more than we had expected. The view from the balcony looked down on the quaint village nestled at the bottom of the mountain.  It was a dream come true; a place for rest and relaxation, no stress, no worries, no responsibility.  For two gals in their early 30’s it was an escape from reality; a little peace of heaven on earth placed there for our enjoyment.  Yes, 1984 was going to be a good year.

Lou and I were ready! After taking our cooler and bags from the car we jumped into our comfortable pajama pants and long sloppy tee shirts. We tuned into our favorite radio station and brought out our manicuring sets, facial masks, curling irons, chocolate candy bars, chips and soda pop. Of course, Lou had her favorite love story book while I had my mediation and inspirational book to read. Lou flopped down on one couch with her legs hanging over the end as I spread out on the floor with my feet and legs in a chair. After pampering ourselves for a few hours, we decided to go to bed early to get some much needed sleep before our sightseeing trip that we had planned for the next day.

After sleeping for about two hours I woke up to a pounding sound on the window by my bed.  I pulled back the curtains to see sleet, ice and snow falling all around. The driveway was covered in ice and of course we were at the very top of the mountain.  We were iced in a snow storm to be remembered! Old man winter had returned in full force. I awakened Lou.  Immediately she started to panic.  She was crying as fear over took her.  We both were due back to work within two days and could not afford to miss any pay.  I had a fear of driving in bad weather and always avoided it.  After listening to the weather news, we learned the snow was suppose to continue for two days and there was talk of shutting the highways down.  I felt scared, powerless and out of control.

Lou was not into meditation and prayer but I was. I asked if she would pray with me.  She agreed and we held each others hands while I prayed.  A since of peace came over me that words can not even describe. The answer came!

Some how we de-iced the car and I drove it down the steep mountain. We made it to the highway where there were no vehicles in sight. Along the way, we stopped at a gas station for a fill up.  A truck driver asked us if we were crazy for driving in the weather.  I smiled and replied, “ No Sir. There is something more powerful than me behind the wheel of this car.”  We then continued on our way.  It was a fourteen hour drive which in normal conditions would have only taken five hours.  I remained calm during the entire trip.  My fear of driving had been removed.  My faith had been strengthened. We arrived safely back in the big city.  Lou now prays and meditates.  As for me, I have a story.  I have a memory.  It may not have been the escape that we wanted but it was the Gift that we needed.  It was The Power Of Faith and Peace Within.  The Gift was priceless and now it is being shared with you!

Originally posted 2011-02-26 09:11:27.